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10 Things I'd Tell my younger self

3/8/2017

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The world ain't perfect sunshine,
but that's the best part.
Flaws reminds us that we're human;
​we're alive.

Picture

1. MOM IS USUALLY RIGHT

This implies to multiple areas of life. From fashion choices, to relationships, major life decisions and even her questionable 'medical advice' (drinking water is her solution to every thing under the sun). You may argue, you may debate, you may even present her a thesis of your findings; but lo and behold, she will be right. Again and again.

Looking back, I should've listen and not intentionally go sun tanning every opportunity I could. I thought the sun-burnt look was the trend, so I was nicknamed 'burnt fish' throughout primary school. Then came the fights every Sunday morning. Mom would try to get me to wear something nice, but I wouldn't have it. Nothing made me happier than my sleeveless kikilala tank top and my adventure pants. One word - HIDEOUS. Now I look back at old photos and just want to burn them all as a sacrifice to the WHAT-WAS-SHE-WEARING-GODS. *jokes* (There is only one Almighty God, and he forgave my lycra-9-pocket box shorts)

I seriously could go on and on, but if any of you feel like your mom is being unreasonable. Take a deep breath and really give it some good thought and consideration. Moms always want the best for us, even when they occupy 75% of our lives nagging; Believe me it's for the best.

2. DISCIPLINE, DISCIPLINE, DISCIPLINE

Swimming training & competitions, tennis practices, Violin solo, group practice and orchestra, taekwondo, after school athletics, Cross Country, Debate Club, ISCF, Tuitions, Mandarin classes, Church groups, Worship practice...

I had to schedule in birthday parties two weeks in advance if I really wanted to go.
"Child Abuse!" they yelled.
I regret nothing. I feel like it wasn't just the skills that benefited me, more so the understanding of discipline. Being able to handle stress and pressure, having to learn to manage my own time and most importantly not giving up when things got hard. To all my coaches and teachers, thank you for moulding me to the somewhat decent person I am today. 

Like my sister would say, "GURL, YOU BETTER WEEERK!"

3. BE ORIGINAL

There was this one girl that I admired so much when I was younger. So I did what a 13 year old me could mentally comprehend. I copied.

I copied the way she talked, her hair styles, the way she dressed. I loved how she was so confident, how guys liked her. I wanted to be just like her. However, it became so exhausting because I couldn't constantly keep up my act. It was starting to lose it's OSCAR/ACADEMY AWARD appeal and I finally decided one day that I would stop, not because I wanted to; I was tired. 

However, when I stopped trying to copy-paste, I really grew into my own and people seemed to like it. I became more happy with myself, more confident and I just had more time and space to focus on improving myself rather than copying someone else. 

Remember, Imitation isn't as valued.

4. TRY! DON'T LIMIT YOURSELF

If I could turn back time, I would've dived into music and singing a whole lot earlier. I used to think that it just wasn't my thing so I didn't even bothered trying. I am also happy that I tried so many things since as early as I could remember, it taught me balance and that helps loads when you have to 'adult'. 

5. THINGS WILL CHANGE

Change is the only constant. No matter how much you think that one thing or one person is of the utmost importance, time will tell; seasons will change. Your likings will changes, your hopes and dreams will change, your fears change... Heck, YOU WILL CHANGE!

I used to think swimming was my world and when I had to stop I felt my world came crashing down. I had found my identity in it, my friends, my entire social life. Of course there are the crushes and the " semi-relationships", the disastrous exam results or the pimples, the self-consciousness/ self esteem stuff. etc.

Everything will change and you will be fine, just take things as they are and be grateful for each day.

6. FITTING IN IS *SOMEWHAT* IMPORTANT

Social skills gets you pretty far in life. Learning to read people's emotions, learning to empathise; Those things are insanely important. Try to work with people from all backgrounds, even when it's challenging and you can't fully understand them because that is life. 

"在 家靠父母 , 出外靠朋友"
You can google that. 12 years of Chinese classes right there!

7. YOU ARE WHAT YOU BELIEVE YOU ARE

If you think you're gonna suck at something and you keep telling yourself that, you probably will. So channel that negativity into positivity and focus on always better-ing (is that even a word) yourself. 

8. STRESS IS GOOD.

My favourite TED talk of all time will explain this concisely and precisely.

9. KNOW WHEN NOT TO COMPROMISE

Life is all about compromise, I agree. 
However, there are core values that shouldn't be compromised; core values that shape and define you. For me, that's definitely my faith. There has been so many things I've tried to change or compromise over the years, but the one thing I've promised I would never change is my belief.

Well, to each their own.
You're gonna have to figure out the values that you matter to you, but in that process, you are no way in a position to ever judge someone else's core values. Learn to love your neighbours as yourself, even when you can agree to disagree. Narrow-mindedness is no one's friend.

10. ENJOY YOURSELF

Don't hurry to grow up and don't drag it either. You're never going to know what the future entails and that is completely normal. Even on the days when everything just seems to be going wrong or when you have the week from hell and you just want it to end, remember to enjoy each and every moment and to live in the moment. Your perspective in life is the defining factor of what makes a 'good' or 'bad' day.

Don't get so caught up chasing a future dream that you neglect the people in your present. Don't continuously wallow in the past that you don't give your future a shot. Do the things that you love, and do things for others out of love. There is no bigger enjoyment than living a life for more than just yourself.


If only mini me could've read this.

xo
Joyce
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