A Valentine's Dedication
You live and you learn, and in the midst of that you love.
You love once, twice or twenty five; you love nonetheless.
Each time different from the other.
All beautiful in it's season.
I remember the first time I fell in love.
We talked, smiled when we locked eyes,
Never held hands; in fact -
I was shy as hell
But it was love.
All the love I could handle and possibly understand at 13.
Over the years, there were many more encounters of love...
Taka cake(s), RM6 Star Cineplex movie tickets, sitting next to each other in tuition;
evolving into lunch dates, hand holding, late night phone calls.
There was always the thrill of telling a friend or even in keeping it a secret,
and there was also heartache when knowing that it was time for it to end.
My world crashed when I had my first heartbreak.
It's a kind of pain no one really prepares you for; a pain that is real,
regardless of age or stage of life.
I used to think that a 19 year old's pain would be different,
" they don't know real love yet. "
19 year old me would beg to differ.
We love whole heartedly,
at any stage of life.
That's the beauty of love,
it is unquantifiable and unconditional.
Not like, not lust.
I don't remember the grand-ness of the Valentine's dates as much as
the 'spur-of-the-moment' late night drive through(s) to McD.
I remember the time he cried, much more so then the expensive gifts he bought.
400 likes on a Facebook post was pretty cool and all,
but that knocked table and cute stutter on our first breakfast was waaay cooler.
That's what I love,
and how I love now.
A love that was crafted over the last 23 years,
through multitudes of great (and not so great) dates.
A love formed through heartbreak and disappointment;
yet with an abundance of faith, hope and love (some pixie dust too),
I continue to love nonetheless.
that this time it would be my last.
Written for A.